Perhaps because alcohol consumption increases during the holidays, the number of hit-and-run accidents increases as well. But this post isn’t about a run-of-the-mill holiday hit-and-run. It focuses on the ultimate holiday hit-and-run, memorialized by the classic Christmas novelty song Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer.
Most people probably know the catchy “Grandma got run over by a reindeer” chorus. But in this post, we’ll analyze the first two critical verses and discover what they mean, or don’t mean, to the criminal case against Santa.
This family’s struggles mirror the struggles of other hit-and-run victim families. Their experience also echoes some legal issues that a Marietta criminal defense lawyer often deals with in hit-and-run accident and DUI-collision criminal cases. The Ho Ho Ho hit-and-run didn’t end well for Grandma’s family, but with the help of a good lawyer, these cases often end reasonably well for defendants.
Verse One: Prelude to Tragedy
She’d been drinkin’ too much eggnog
And we’d begged her not to go
But she forgot her medication
And she staggered out the door into the snow
Comparative negligence, such as Grandma’s impairment (too much eggnog and lack of medication) is a significant issue in civil cases. Basically, comparative fault allows an insurance company to shift blame for a car accident from the tortfeasor (negligent driver) to the victim.
By the book, comparative negligence doesn’t matter in criminal cases. Criminal cases focus exclusively on the defendant and the defendant’s conduct. However, comparative negligence in civil court could be a mitigating circumstance in criminal court.
A Marietta criminal defense lawyer must walk a fine line in these situations. An attorney must point out mitigating circumstances without blaming the alleged victim for getting killed, a strategy that will obviously backfire.
Yes, some affirmative defenses are available in some criminal cases. Consent in a sexual battery case is a good example. However, consent is a deliberate act. Most people voluntarily consume alcohol or “forget” their meds. But they don’t voluntarily embrace the ill effects of impairment.
This verse does set up one a lingering conspiracy theory about this song. Did someone, perhaps Grandpa, plan Grandma’s demise? Such theories could be defenses in criminal cases. More on that below.
Verse Two: Physical Evidence
When we found her Christmas mornin’
At the scene of the attack
She had hoof prints on her forehead
And incriminating Claus marks on her back
At first, the case against the Jolly Old Elf appears airtight, although we aren’t exactly sure what a “Claus mark” is. However, upon further review, the case isn’t as strong as it seems.
The physical evidence has chain of custody and corruption issues. No one found the body until Christmas morning, perhaps twelve hours after the alleged hit-and-run. If Santa was busy all night and not watching where he was going, as prosecutors would most likely argue, the scene was definitely contaminated.
Additionally, since the burden of proof is so high in criminal cases, circumstantial evidence alone often isn’t enough to obtain a conviction. Frequently, investigators interrogate suspects and confront them with the circumstantial evidence, hoping that the suspects confess.
Verse Three: Emotional Aspects of Violent Crime Cases, Part I
Now we’re all so proud of Grandpa
He’s been takin’ this so well
See him in there watchin’ football
Drinkin’ beer and playin’ cards with Cousin Mel
Technically, criminal courts only analyze the facts of the matter and render judgement based solely on those facts. However, violent crime cases usually have an emotional dimension. Sometimes these emotional factors work for a Marietta criminal defense lawyer, and sometimes they don’t.
Verse Three is an example of the former. Prosecutors often play to juror emotions, especially in murder cases, usually by displaying pictures of the alleged victim whenever possible to drum up sympathy.
But what if the alleged victim is a neighborhood drug dealer or another unsympathetic person? Or, as is the case in GGROBAR, what if a tearful widow or other survivor never takes the stand?
We mentioned the conspiracy theory above. Why is Grandpa, who should be distraught over the situation, apparently not upset? Did he already have his eye on Cousin Mel? Are we talking Double Indemnity here?
A plausible alternative explanation creates reasonable doubt. Additionally, an unsympathetic victim creates problems for prosecutors.
The plausible alternative explanation only works with some evidence to support it. Typically, jurors are unwilling to embrace unsubstantiated green-men-from-Mars conspiracy theories. However, if support is available (e.g. Grandpa and Mel were texting or Grandpa recently took out an insurance policy on Grandma’s life), this approach usually works.
At the very least, an unsympathetic victim usually means an unsympathetic jury. If the victim’s friends and family are shady or don’t care about the loss, why should we care about it?
Verse Four: Emotional Aspects of Violent Crime Cases, Part II
It’s not Christmas without Grandma
All the family’s dressed in black
And we just can’t help but wonder:
Should we open up her gifts or send them back?
(Send them back!)
Unfortunately, the emotion of a violent crime case usually works in favor of prosecutors. If a tragic loss shatters a family, jurors generally want to blame someone. The defendant, who has been arrested for the crime, is a convenient target.
Strong emotion usually affects settlement negotiations. Grieving family members and/or seriously injured alleged victims often affects the way a Marietta criminal defense lawyer approaches settlement negotiations. The emotional dimensions, unless a lawyer can short-circuit them as outlined above, may force the defendant to accept a less-favorable plea bargain agreement.
These short-circuiting efforts could also include a motion in liminie to block emotional references. These motions often serve two purposes. If judges grant them, defendants immediately win. If judges deny them, defendants ultimately win. They now have grounds for appeal.
Happy holidays to you, no matter how you celebrate them. For a free consultation with an experienced Marietta criminal defense attorney, contact The Phillips Law Firm, LLC. The sooner you reach out to us, the sooner we start working for you.
